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Cold calling (Walter V. Jeffries)

My brother and I work at home (yes, we're programmers) and receive a many calls
from stockbrokers.  Unsolicited calls.  Unwanted calls.  Interruptions.  You
get the picture...  Needless to say we NEVER buy stocks.  Our approach to these
calls its to use them as a chance to vent any pent up furies and hostilities
we might have at the moment.  The poor idiot stock broker who placed this
unsolicited sales call of course is always afraid to hang up no matter how
abusive we get just on the off chance that he might make a sale.  This is all
fine and dandy.  Everyone ends up happy.  He fullfils his outgoing call quota
and we get a little free cathartic therapy on his dime.  Unfortunately, the other week was particularly smooth so one the latest sucker called the conversation
went more like this:


Me: Hello, this is Walter.  May I help you?

Stockbroker: Hello Mr. Jeffries, this is Mike from <"Prestegious" NY> Brokers.  I just wanted to call to introduce myself.  I want to assure you that this is not a sales call.  I...

Me: Hold it.  I think you want to speak to my brother today.

Me: [Much louder without covering the mouth piece] Hey, John, There's a jerk on the phone who wants to sell us stock?  Got any aggression you want to work out on him?

John: [From the next room but even louder] No, not today!

Me: [To the stockbroker] I'm sorry, Mike, but you've called at a bad time.  Neither of us have any frustrations or agressions that we want to take out on you today.  But don't bother calling back.  As they say, we'll call you...

Stockbroker: Oh...

Me: Click [hanging up phone]

We of course cracked up laughing.  I wonder if Mike did too? :-)

*Footnote: We have figured out the predominant source of these calls.  Turns out that Dun & Bradstreet sells their mailing lists (of course) to stockbrokers and they use them for cold calls.  They had FOUR listings for us.  They did promise 
 not to give our name out any more. We'll see.  Give them a call at 
 (215) 481-9760 if you want to get off of their list...

PS. For those of you who are stock brokers and object to the previous...
    Don't call us, we'll call you... :-)

Man, do I hate sales cold calls!

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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