Best of Jokes Current Jokes RHF Home Search Sponsor RHF?
Fun Stuff & Jokes
Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

From the Unnatural Enquirer: The Burrito-1000 (trygve lode)
(original, smirk, computer)

Burrowers Corporation, for decades a leader in mainframe computing
introduces the first personal portable computer good enough to bear
the Burrowers name:
                        The Burrito-1000
Why gamble on new and untried technology, risk your precious data with
equipment and manufacturers that don't have a proven track-record when
you can buy the Burrito-1000, the culmination of decades of refinement
of reliable, proven technology?
Just look at how the Burrito-1000 compares with other personal
                                  IBM       Apple      CDC     Burrito
                                   PC     Macintosh   Cyber     1000
 * Built-in thermal printer        No        No        No       Yes
 * EBCDIC compatible               No        No        Yes      Yes
 * Built-in 9-Track 1600BPI
   ANSI standard 1/2" tape         No        No        opt.     Yes
 * Built-in punchcard reader       No        No        opt.     Yes
 * Fits in briefcase               No        No        No       Yes(1)
 * Current-loop interface          No        No        opt.     Yes
 * Batch processing                No        No        Yes      Yes
 * Accepts 3-phase power           No        No        Yes      Yes
 * Internal word size            16 Bits   32 Bits   60 Bits   87 Bits
 * Internal memory               a little   some      oodles    gobs
 * Power steering                  No        No         No       No
 * Teletype compatible
   paper tape reader               No        No         No      Yes
 * Just right for you             Nope     Uh-unh      CBNC(2)  YES!
(1) Large briefcase required
(2) Close, but no cigar
Plus, the Burrito-1000 features the following powerful software packages:
BASTRANBOL:  The first truly all-purpose computer language--combines
             the structure and maintainability of BASIC with the
             simplicity and convenience of FORTRAN and the efficiency
             and elegance of COBOL.  Plus, it's Ada-compatible!
Debased Too:  The most user-friendy batch-mode database program
Caterpillar Tractors' new Spreadsheet system:  generates more BS for
            your reports than any other spreadsheet!
     Yes, finally, there's a computer that's just right for you!
                          The Burrito-1000
    (Now available at the Boatanchor Computer Center nearest you.)
The Unnatural Enquirer, (C) 1990 by Trygve Lode   (
May be reproduced and distributed freely in unmodified form on a
noncommercial basis provided this notice remains intact.

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

Best of Jokes | Current Jokes | RHF Home | Search