| RHF Joke Archives |

What follows are the latest entries in the true news file. These are jokes which are funny, but which didn't really warrant posting separately. I post such a digest whenever I have enough entries to warrant it. Particularly selective readers will probably not enjoy the digests, and may want to killfile RHF jokes with "Digest" in the title - ed.

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>From: nolindan@ix.netcom.com (Nicholas O. Lindan)
>Subject: Honestly described products

The hyperdictionary web site giving the definition for 'jejune', 
http://www.hyperdictionary.com/dictionary/jejune, also lists: 

Websites: 

o  Buy Jejune Products 
     We link to merchants which offer Jejune products for sale. 

o  bounce.deal-market.com 
     Find the Best Jejune Sites With Starware 



Jejune--Synonyms: adolescent, immature, insipid, insubstantial,=20 
                    juvenile, puerile, uninteresting, unwholesome=20 


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>From: jokes@geodosch.com (George Doscher) 
>Subject: Technology we could do without 

>From a 12/05/04 Reuters story on Yahoo! News:

"Now Japanese mobile operators are taking phone sound systems to the next level with stereo-quality songs that can be fully downloaded and edited, as well as surround-sound systems that trick users into hearing a bell ringing behind them or a ball whizzing by."

What a genius idea: you hear your cell phone ringing, but can't tell where the sound is coming from.

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>From: rtischler@wilcoxassoc.com (Rick Tischler)
>Organization: Wilcox Associates, Inc.
>Subject: Over protection

A co-worker sent me a desk top computer. To save time, he took it to FedEx and had them pack and ship it. When I unpacked the computer, I saw excellent job FedEx did in packing it. Right down to the bubble wrapped power cord.

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Pleasant Dreams!

The Bush Administration has announced that Texas swing band "Asleep at the Wheel" will headline at the inaugural festivities.

Really.

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>From: charlene.vickers@gmail.com (Charlene Vickers)
>Subject: Stop In the Name of - ?

I had to call the local police this evening on a non-urgent matter. After negotiating the voice mail system, I finally found the right department and was put on hold for the next available agent. The hold music?

"Prisoner of Love."

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>From: HUGHDAVID4@aol.com
>Subject: A sad echo from the age of the hippy

Our local hippies are growing old. A graffito here reads: -

MAKE TEA NOT WAR

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>From: kevin.backs@rogers.com (Kevin Backs)
>Subject: Heat wave, topical.

I was in the Parkdale area in Toronto last week during the height of the
heat wave.

I'm sure I saw a hooker holding up a sign that read, "Will give BJ for AC."

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>From: henry@henryfarkas.com (Henry W. Farkas)
>Subject: You have to wonder

>From a friend:

Yesterday, on my way to work, I saw a sign on the back (working end) of a garbage truck that said, "Children First."

It made me wonder...

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>From: jagath@uwo.ca (Jagath Samarabandu)
>Organization: The University of Western Ontario
>Subject: Only in politics

Saw on a Canadian local news network last night:

Liberals promise to promise less

I said, "Huh?" on so many levels

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>From: terry.mccreary@murraystate.edu (Terry McCreary)
>Subject: Truth in advertising?

Most spam isn't particularly noteworthy, but it would appear that some of the creators of lottery spam are attempting to bypass mail filters while promoting truth in advertising.

Several lottery-spam messages ended in my junk mailbox yesterday, all of which had the same subject: World Wide Lootery agent.

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>From: shantanu_ganguly@yahoo.com (Shantanu Ganguly)
>Subject: an intelligent voice recognition system

I dialed the toll free number for one of my credit cards, and a voice on the other end said, "Hi, I will be helping you with your account." At that point, I muttered under my breath "Oh no you won't." To my surprise, the automated voice seemed to understand that, because it said, "Transferring to a customer service agent" and soon afterwards I was talking to a live person.

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