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Dear Tide... (Doug)
(smirk, sick)

Dear Tide,

        I have always used your product ever since my college days, because
mom says it was the best.  Anyhow, one weekend about a month ago, I was at
my girlfriend's place, wearing my new white shirt.  Much to my chagrin, I
spilled some red wine on my white shirt.  She made a comment about my
drinking problem, one thing lead to another, and soon I had her blood all
over my not-so-nice white shirt.  I tried washing it with her detergent,
and it just didn't do the trick.  So, on my way home, I stopped at the store
and picked up a box of new Ultra Tide.  It washed the stain so well that
the DNA tests were entirely inconclusive!  

        I can't praise your product enough.  Thank you for saving my life!
I must go now... I also have to send my praise to the makers of Hefty
garbage bags...

Thanks again!

John Smith

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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