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White Male Awareness Month (was Re: OJ acquited during...)

marks@server1.DELTANET.COM (Mark Sobolewski)
Oceanside Network Solutions
(topical, chuckle, offense=women,non-whites) (Eric Hansen) in alt.feminism writes:

>Subject: OJ acquitted during domestic violence awareness month
> IRONY (noun)
> 1. Emphasis by stating the opposite; covert sarcasm.
> 2. The frustration of hopes.

Gosh, you know... I see things like "domestic violence awareness
month" and "black history awareness month" but never anything that
pertains to anyone who's white or white and male...

So I propose:

White Male Oppression Awareness Month!

The month chosen will be January.  Reasons:

1) It's the first month.  White males should always come first because
we oppress everyone.

2) It's also a 31 day month.  White males deserve to get the most.

3) Being a winter month, we can force everyone to watch our parade
and speeches in cold weather.  This is acceptable because white males
get off on watching other people suffer.

4) This gives the rest of the people 11 months to complain about what
white males did the first month...

Calendar of events:

Jan 1st: Start of a new year of oppressing everyone!  IRS joins in on the
      fun by delivering 1040 forms.

Jan 2nd: Starve minority children day.  White males return unwanted Xmas
      gifts and spend money on 4 wheel vehicles and fishing boats
      instead of mailing it to the government to spend on progressive
      social programs.      

Jan 10th: Superbowl Sunday.  
      Official day when white males beat their wives providing necessary
      work for people manning shelter hot lines.  

Jan 15th: Official Riot and Looting day!  Day for disgruntled white males
      to loot and burn down stores as a means for political expression.
      Since it's so cold, however, most white males stay home.  This
      explains why white people never trash anything.  Maybe we should
      change this to June...

Jan 16th: Request Federal aid for rebuilding our cities after the riots.
      Since no riot occurred, funds are redirected to Mark Fuhrman legal
      defense fund.

Jan 17th: Rally honoring custodial fathers who collect from the $100
      Billion dollar welfare system.  All 10 of them...

Jan 20th: White male migration day.  Millions of white males grab their
      children and run for Tiajuana demanding Mexico pay for free
      medical care, housing, and education.

Jan 21st: Didn't work.  White males return home and beg their bosses for
      their job back.

Jan 22nd: Most white males rehired.  This is the only day that employers
      post listings: "White males encouraged to apply."

Jan 25th: Equinox.  Days start getting longer and nights shorter.  White
      males use this to oppress people somehow...

Jan31st: End of White Male Month Destroy the Environmont JAMBOREE!
      White males drive cross country in an effort to burn all the gas
      we won in the gulf war.  This results in global warming making
      next year's parade more bearable...

Disclaimer: This disclaimer is necessary for anyone who makes race comments
or jokes about non-white-males.   Author claims to not be racist or
horrible even if he is because it makes sense.  Do you really think he
would admit it?  If the reader wishes to retaliate in some fashion, he
may do so against other white males or the author's unborn children in
a fashion acceptable to federal law.

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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