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News item: An 85-year-old Bavarian man called the police on a recent night after his wife, also 85, locked herself in their bedroom with her young lover, the police said. The man asked the police to expel his wife's friend because he was too frail to do it himself. When the police told him they could not intervene in domestic disputes, the retiree retorted: "I shall just have to be unfaithful myself, then." -- Reported in The International Herald Tribune, Jan 5
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