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Game with the Warden (Steven Schoenberg)
(smirk, gross, hunting)

This one is from the south and is best told with a southern accent. 

I was deer hunting in the mountains of North Carolina. After about four hours
I shot a nice 400lb buck. While I was hauling the dear back to my truck, I 
was stopped by the game worden, he wanted to see my hunting permit. I showed
him my N.C. permit, after which he proceeded to stick his finger up the deer's
asshole. He pulled his finger out and smelled it. The worden told me that the
deer was a Virgina deer, and he wanted to see my Virgina permit. I had hunted
in Norfork, Virgina about two months ago, so I looked through my wallet and 
showed him my Virgina permit.  He was very upset because he got some enjoyment
from handing out fines to hunters without permits.

About one week later I was out hunting again on the same property. I was in a
tree stand for almost seven hours before I spotted my first deer. I had a
clean shot, and popped the deer right in the neck. While taking the deer back
to my truck, the same perverted worden came up and insisted he be allowed to
inspect the deer. He stuck his finger right up the deer's ass and then smelled
and licked his finger. I was about to throw up. He told me that the deer was
from South Carolina and he wanted my S.C. permit.  I ran back to my truck and
got the S.C. permit out of my glove compartment.  This time the worden seemed
even more upset then he did the last time. Of course he could not give me a
ticket and he had to let me go.

I shot three more deers during the rest of the season, and every time he did

the same thing. He stuck his finger up the deer's butt and told me that I
needed I license from Georgia, Alabama, and then West Virgina. I had a 
permit for every state. He was so mad when I showed him my permit from West
Virgina, I thought he was going to kill me. He said " Boy, you got a permit
for every damn state in the South, Where the hell you from?"

I pulled down my pants and bent over, and then told the worden, "why don't
you tell me!"

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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