Good Evening, this is Heather McLlelan for Channel 6 and these are the news. Tonight : First we will tell you about all the other people just like you who got shot today. Also we will tell you how is the weather outside, which is very useful, specially if you happen to live on a bunker. Then we'll predict that for the next few hours the weather will remain pretty much the same. For tomorrow morning's weather, we'll make the random prediction of our choice. And last, we'll predict that the weather "hopefully" will improve for the weekend, as in: Scientists have now determined that we are in the middle of a new ice age, so the next couple of days will be bitterly cold, but hopefully the weather will improve for the weekend. Then we'll have a discussion panel to analyze the recent increase in the price of coffee. With us we have: B. Smith, Professor of Economics, Expert and Global Trade and winner of the Prestigious Milesrock Prize in Economics. S. Moraes, CEO of BrazCoffee, the largest producer of coffee in the world. Y. Kigimura, Minister of Trade of the Japanese government. and S. Kelly, a guy who buys a cup of coffee every morning on his way to work. In sports, we'll show you all the amazing baskets you missed while you were working earning $4.50 an hour, while not forgetting to mention the multi-million dollar salaries of each of the players you will see on screen. For the last five minutes, for which we could get no noteworthy news (the peace agreement between Arabs and Israelis was signed this morning, but if it didn't happen within reach of our newsmobile's satellite dish it is not news) we will have a report from the latest college dropout to join our broadcasting team, who made an inside report on the St. Patrick elementary school children aged 5-7 and the homework they write from day to day. So don't touch that dial, we'll be right back after the following twenty messages from our sponsors.
(From the "Rest" of RHF)