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Ford Press Release
(topical, smirk, celebrities)

I received a copy of this (on offical Ford letterhead) from a Ford dealer in
Plantation, Fla.
                        SPECIAL NEWS RELEASE
As of Friday, June 24, 1994, the 1994 Ford Bronco has officially been
selected as the vehicle of choice for all felons in the United States.  The
conclusive California road test, as seen on national TV, proved without a
doubt that the 1994 Bronco can successfully hold of 15 or more police cars,
3 police helicopters and the entire population of the United States for more
than an hour and a half, while never exceeding 43 miles-per-hour.  This
vehicle even works as well while parked in the driveway of your residence.
If you are a felon, then we have a special deal for you on a brand new 1994
Ford Bronco.  Just go to your local Ford dealer and ask for the new O.J.
package.  This specially equipped Bronco comes with a .30 caliber pistol,
twenty-five rounds of ammunition, blood resistant upholstery, cellular phone
with speed dialing for 911 calls, a former famous football player blow-up
doll and a high powered, well qualified lawyer who will greet you when you
arrive home.
Picture yourself leaning comfortably back in your seat listening to the
gentle swirl of helicopter blades and police cars purring.  And, if youact
now we will throw in the O.J. magical disappearing ginzu knife at no extra
Be the first one in your town to own the 1994 Ford O.J.Edition Bronco.  See
your local dealer now!!!

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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