Following the news that a 59-year old woman has given birth, we are pleased to announce that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother (age 93) is expecting a child. Her Majesty is naturally delighted by the success of the pioneering operation which took some tissue from her late husband King George VI (believed to be a scrap of fingernail found underneath the carpet) and used it to reconstruct his DNA. The news does have deep constitutional implications, since, if the child turns out to be a boy, he will be the legitimate king of the U.K., and Queen Elizabeth will automatically abdicate in favour of her younger brother. The new king will be discouraged from going anywhere near journalists, portable phones, or women called Camilla. He will also be discouraged from talking to trees. When asked whether she felt that 94 would be too great an age for her to bear a child, the Queen Mum replied, "Well you're as young as you feel, I always say. After all I'll only be 112 when the baby reaches adulthood, and that's no age at all. It is thought likely that scientists will soon be able to reconstruct DNA patterns given far less information -- typically the subject's name, address, date of birth and telephone number (or possibly just even the E-mail address). This naturally will lead to severe moral dilemmas, as women anxious for children hack into databases looking for suitable fathers.
(From the "Rest" of RHF)