Best of Jokes Current Jokes RHF Home Search Sponsor RHF?
Fun Stuff & Jokes
Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

War Injuries
Curtin University of Technology
(smirk, military, gross)

This is an occurence in Britain during World War II, situated anywhere in
particular (use your imagination.)


The army General was making a visit to some of the soldiers' camps, during 
the short ceasefire between both sides.

Today he was to inspect the Red Cross camp, where many tents had been set
up to care for the injured.

He entered one of the tents.  Here in the one tent were three wounded 
soldiers, each being attended to by a nurse.  The atmosphere was stifling.

He walked over to the first soldier, who was lying on his side with a 
bandage around his backside.  The General started talking.

"So soldier, what is the matter with you?"

The soldier motioned for him to come closer.

"Sir, " he whispered, "I have a boil ............ on my bottom."

The General twitched his nose.  "I see.  Dreadful, dreadful.  And what are
they doing for it, soldier?"

"Well, they use a toothbrush, with a bit of iodine, and rub it on, you see."

"I see, I see.  " replied the General.  "And what is 
your ambition in life, soldier?" he asked.

"Well of course," exclaimed the soldier, "to get fit, build my strength up,
and fight for my country!!"

"Good lad!" replied the officer.  He moved over to the second soldier.  The 
second soldier also appeared to have an embarassing injury, with a bandage
and several medical scalples etc between his legs.  He was clenching his teeth
in agony as the nurse operated.

"And what might you be here for, lad?" inquired the General in his loud and
annoyingly pompous voice.

The second soldier looked up.

"I'm afraid I've got a problem, down their....."  He started whispering.  "I've
got marching rash you see.....  A bit of groin rub"

The General casually took a step away.  "Mmm.  Nasty.  And what are the nurses
doing for your injury, soldier?"

"Well," replied the soldier, "same thing, a bit of iodine on the toothbrush
and they rub it on."

The General nodded.  "And what is YOUR ambition in life soldier?"

"Well.  I am definitely hoping that I can get fit and, of course, fight
for my country!" he exclaimed.

"Good for you lad!" boomed the General.

The General moved over to the third soldier.  A nurse was using a small medical
mirror to look deep inside his mouth.  The General looked over him.

"And what's your injury, soldier?"

"Ith goth a thor thoat..." gargled the soldier.


The soldier took a hard cough as the nurse removed the instrument to allow him
to speak more easily.

"I said I've got a sore throat!" he gasped.

The General looked puzzled.  "Oh, I see."  Although the General obviously
thought the injury was quite trivial, he tried hard to look serious.  "And
what are the nursed doing to help you, soldier?"  he inquired politefully.

"Same treatment," replied the soldier.  "A little bit of iodine, on the 
toothbrush, and they rub it on!"

"Right lad.  And what is your ambition in life?"  boomed the General.

"To get to the toothbrush before the other two!!" replied the soldier.

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

Previous | RHF Joke Archives | Next

Best of Jokes | Current Jokes | RHF Home | Search