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Here's my Crushed Cats Joke (John Montbriand)
(sick, chuckle)

Here's a hypothetical situation:

I drove home late last night and drove over the neighbour's cat. What should I do?

(a) hide the cat and let them think it ran away?

(b) wedge the cat under the neighbor's tire so they think they did it?

(c) paint a hexagram on their front lawn and put the cat in the middle so they think that crazy Satanists did it?

(d) throw the cat into my other neighbour's yard?

(e) tell them that the cat will come back?

(f) claim that I had the right of way and the cat had no business running in front of the car when it obviously knew I was going to accelerate?

(g) put the cat in the garborator so there isn't any evidence?

(h) put the cat in a tree, call the fire department and let them try to explain it?

(i) explain that when cats get to a certain age they just lie around a lot and smell bad?

(j) tell them that I ran over their cat with my car?

(l) move away?

(m) buy them a new cat that looks exactly like it?

(n) drive over the rest of the cat's in the neighbourhood and claim that I was on a mission from god?

(r) send them a bill for services rendered?

(t) have the cat stuffed and put it on their front lawn so they won't notice a thing?

(u) mail it to them so they blame it on the postal service?

(v) blow it up?

(w) say that I saw space aliens land a flying saucer on top of it just before they got out and took my socks?

(x) I don't know?

(y) why not?

(z) claim a heard of African zebras stampeded my car causing me to swerve and hit the cat?

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