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Breast Fixation (John Hughes)
(sexual, funny)

One day this fellow noticed that a new couple had moved into the
house next door. He was also quick to notice that the woman liked
to sunbathe in the back yard, usually in a skimpy bikini that
showed off a magnificent pair of breasts. He made it a point to
water and trim his lawn as much as possible, hoping for yet
another look. Finally, he could stand it no more. Walking to the
front door of the new neighbor's house, he knocked and waited.
The husband, a large, burly man, opened the door.

"Excuse me", our man stammered, "but I couldn't help noticing how
beautiful your wife is."

"Yeah? So?" his hulking neighbor replied.

"Well, in particular, I am really struck by how beautiful her
breasts are. I would gladly pay you ten thousand dollars if I could
kiss those breasts."

The burly gorilla is about to deck our poor guy when his wife
appears and stops him. She pulls him inside and they discuss the
offer for a few moments. Finally, they return and ask our friend
to step inside.

"OK," the husband says gruffly, "for ten thousand dollars you can
kiss my wife's tits."

At this the wife unbuttons her blouse, and the twin objects of
desire hang free at last. Our man takes one in each hand, and
proceeds to rub his face against them in total ecstasy. This goes
on for several minutes, until the husband gets annoyed.
"Well, come on already, kiss 'em!" he growls.

"I can't" replies our awe-struck hero, still nuzzling away.

"Why not?" demands the husband, getting really angry now.

"I don't have ten thousand dollars."

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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