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Drunk man and the cat

davidp@wacsvax.oz.au (David Pascoe)
(true, mildly sexual, smirk)

This is a true story told to me recently.

[Ed: But reportedly also an urban legend.]

There was this guy who was married with a grown up son, who used to love to go down the local with his mates. His long suffering wife endured years of his drunken fits, but one night had too much. He arrived home sloshed, and she heard some noise and found her husband asleep on the floor.

Not wanting to lift her now sleeping husband, she just covered him up.

Next, the son comes home and finds his father flaked out on the floor. He decided that the old man needed to be taught a lesson, so he went to the fridge and got a chicken throat (before we go on, picture what it looks like) and undid his father's fly, placing the chicken neck so that it just hung out of his pants.

Early the next morning the wife rose and walked into the lounge room and there was the cat standing over the husband, licking the neck. She promptly fainted, hit the piano and needed 3 stitches on her eye.

(The whole idea was that the old man would go to the toilet in the morning and wet himself.)


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