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Voting Tips

bear@whuts.UUCP (BELLIVEAU)
AT&T Bell Laboratories
(funny, topical)

Seen on Late Night w/David Letterman recently:

             David Letterman's Top 10 Voting Tips:

10)   Practice voting by flicking light switch on and off.

 9)   Always find out how a candidate stands on Sunday beer sales.

 8)   If you say the name "DUKAKIS" out loud 100 times, 
      it starts to sound real funny.

 7)   We want someone who's going to stand up to Iran or Iraq or
      whoever has the bearded guy.

 6)   As a gag, close curtain in booth and yell "Hey! Who used 
      up all the hot water?"

 5)   Voting is important, but nobody would blame you if you stayed
      home and watched "HARDBODIES" on cable again.

 4)   If television station pre-empts wrestling for primary 
      coverage, call and complain.

 3)   Introduce yourself in bars as Albert Gore. Who'd know?

 2)   President Stallone: It won't happen, unless we MAKE it happen!

... Drumroll .............

 1)   Remember: Your vote counts as much as those people who 
                actually KNOW who the candidates are.

(From the "Rest" of RHF)

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