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New Technologies

ken@richp1.UUCP (Ken Marks)
Rich Inc., Chicago
(smirk)

The following is part of an article called "Chips Found Floating Down
Silicon Slough".  The original author's name is in small print (probably
at his own request) and has not stood the test of time nor the countless
Xeroxings.  

[ Reported stolen from Byte Magazine, April 1982 ]


The Don't Gate
	You don't get any output no matter what's at the inputs.  It is 
	believed that the DON'T gate was the breakthrough that made the
	LSI write only memory possible.

Noise Emitting Diode (NED)
	When connected across a 1000 volt supply it makes a loud noise
	(once).  The NED was discovered by Igor Pravaganda whom you'll
	recall worked many years trying to filter AC with electrolytics.
	He'll always be remembered as the father of the confetti generator.

Shiftless Register
	Must be used with 3 speed forward clutch gate.  Shifts at 15, 25,
	and 35 bits per second.  Double clutching with logic 2s is not
	suggested.

Inoperational Amplifier (IN-OP AMP)
	Linear cousin of the DON'T gate.  Provides no output for any input
	at a slew rate of 0 volts per microsecond.  Mil Spec. version
	available at 100 times the cost of OEM version.

J(UN)K Flip Flop
	Doesn't change state when clocked regardless of input states.
	Changes only when cola machine down the hall makes change.

Excess 3 to Insufficient 4 Carry Forward Fudger
	Used to enter the Murphy factor and get the programmer of the hook.

MOSS
	Highly experimental material.  Very rare at present since the only
	source is from under grizzly bear toenails.  Turns green when facing
	north while on wood substrate.

Fuzz Locked Loop
	Great if you want to avoid radar speed traps.


I would enjoy hearing about any other cutting edge of technology items and
as always will ignore any unjustified flames.  :-)

Ken Marks

(From the "Rest" of RHF)


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