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I had the occasion to fly recently on an American airline that shall remain unnamed.

As we were taxiing out to the runway, we made an ominous turn. Sure enough, we ended up in the penalty box. The pilot came on with the standard bland announcement about how he'd seen something he didn't like and wanted to make sure that everything was o.k. (leaving the passengers to wonder whether the backup radio had hiccuped or whether one of the wings was about to fall off).

We sat there for a while, then he came back on, said the problem was fixed, and we headed back to the runway. Just before getting to the runway, we turned in the wrong direction ("Damn!" I said a bit too loudly), and he came on to say that the problem had popped back up and that we were headed back to the gate to have a mechanic take a look at it.

We got back to the gate, where we sat. I never saw a mechanic come out to the plane, but after a short while we started moving to the runway again. The pilot announced, "Well, folks, these planes are essentially flown by computer, so we had to do a bit of reprogramming, but everything looks good now, and we're going to try again." (I think to myself, Oh, o.k., you've had to reboot the plane.)

Sure enough, the third time was the charm, and off we went into the wild blue yonder.

Arriving at our destination, as I was exiting the plane, I overhead the following conversation:

Attendant: Wow, I was sure that we were going to have to cancel.
Pilot: Yes, but we triumphed over the forces of Evil!

Moral:
The next time you step on a plane, remember that it may be being flown
by Microsoft.

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