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What are they doing over there?

monsters@monstersoft.com (MonsterSoft)
(smirk, forwarded)

A friend of mine just inherited a warehouse zoned M1 right next to the Kirtland Air Force Base here in Albuquerque. He wasn't quite sure what to do with it.. so we mused as to what we could do to play on the paranoia of the US Government. Here's the list we came up with:


1. Put a huge parabolic dish on the top pointed straight at the base
2. Surround the property with razor wire
3. Tear down the warehouse and put a TufShed in it's place...
4. Lock the shed with electronic keypads and hand/eye/fingerprint scanners
5. Paint in big bold letters on the side, "DANGER: HIGH VOLTAGE"...
6. In six different languages...
7. Followed by "IRS Satellite Field Office"
8. Build undergound tunnels so that many people may leave but no one is
ever observed entering
9. Park a white van ouside equipped with several 100" steel whips and a
large power transformer sticking out the back
10. Put a magnetic sign on the side "Khalib's Diaper Service"
11. Change it every other day to signs such as "Pizza Hut," "Flowers By
Irene," or "Witness Relocation Program Courtesy Van"
12. Indicate the presence of land mines
13. Put car dealership flags up...
14. On flagpoles that look surprisingly like antennas
15. Have Chinese food delivered 22 times a day
16. At night make strange noises. Blame it on the Taos hum
17. Request an OC48 line for "Statistical Analysis of Porn Downloads"
18. When anyone inquires about the property claim "Diplomatic immunity"

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