EXCLUSIVE PHOTO: Turing machine with two heads!
STARTLING EVIDENCE: LISP came from Mars?
SHOCKING EXPOSE: Illegal core dumping in Lake Erie!
TRUE STORY: Man inverts singular matrix and lives to tell!
REVELATION: Top scientist discovers New Jersey on Karnaugh map!
OS SCANDAL: Unix and Ms. Dos found in love nest!
PSYCHIC PREDICTS: Fixed points will break again!
CIA SECRET: Proof of P=NP found in UFO!
ANALYSTS PANIC: Prime numbers missing from IEEE floating point?
SOFTWARE REVOLUTION: Marxists scheme classless Smalltalk!