Guys, A real excerpt from the 4 August 1996 church bulletin. Hope you all enjoy it! -Matt NO EXCUSE SUNDAY __________________ To make it possible for everyone to attend church next Sunday we are going to have a special "No Excuse Sunday". Cots will be placed in the foyer for those who say "Sunday is my only day to sleep in". We will have steel helmets for those who think the church is too cold, and fans for those who say it is too hot. We will have hearing aids for those who say "The Priest talks too softly", and cotton for those who say HE preaches too loudly. Score cards for those who wish to list hypocrites present. Some relatives will be in attendance for those who like to go visiting on Sundays. There will be TV dinners for those who can't go to Church and cook dinner also. One section will be devoted to trees and grass for those who like to see God in Nature. Finally the Sancuary will be decorated with both Christmas pointsettias and Easter Lillies for those who have never seen the church without them.
(From the "Rest" of RHF)