BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO... especially when you share the same major! written by ADAM LASNIK, firstname.lastname@example.org webpage: http://adam.eigenmann.indiana.edu/ <--lots of humor and more :) or: http://pobox.com/~music PSYCHOLOGY: Girl accuses guy of just using her as a substitute for his Mother. SOCIOLOGY: Each claims to have been oppressed in the relationship. RELIGION: Each prays for reconcilliation and/or curses God ARCHAEOLOGY: One tries to bury the past, and accuses the other of trying to dig it up. THEATRE: "OH MY GOD! Life is... ENDED... as we KNOW it!" BIOLOGY: "You just wanted to get in my genes!" PHYSICS: Both resign themselves to the fact that what goes up must come down. JOURNALISM: "Today was the end of an era. Jack, 19, and Jill, 18, called an end to their relationship of 2 weeks..." WOMEN'S STUDIES: "HE did it!" BUSINESS: Both decide that they're spending way too much money together, and that it's simply cheaper to be single. ITALIAN: "Mama Mia!" HISTORY: Each party argues the breakup was caused by something the other party did in the past. GEOGRAPHY: Both people decide to simply move far away to avoid each other. ANATOMY: "I never liked your body anyway." ECONOMICS: One party demands more than the other can supply. ENGLISH: Each writes the other a perfect breakup letter, complete with introduction, thesis, body, and conclusion, that doesn't really say anything substantively intelligible. EDUCATION: Both concede that the relationship was a learning experience. COMPUTING: "Man, this bytes -- we just couldn't interface" and/or "His hard drive was more like a floppy." E. ENGINEER.: "It's just so shocking... I'm sure there are positives and negatives, but..." [okay, yes, I know you're groaning ;-)] ARCHITECTURE: "There just wasn't much to build on anyway..." JEWISH STUDIES: "OY! You should feel so guilty!" PHILOSOPHY: If 2 people break up in a dorm and there's no one to witness the breakup, are they really single? ZOOLOGY: They were able to mate like banshees, but lacked sophisticated communication skills. PHYS. ED.: They punch each other out in frustration. CHEMISTRY: They turn to hard drugs to relieve the pain. COUNSELING: Each urges the other to "get help!" MUSIC: Each utilizes an operatic lament (or, in Tennessee, a country song) to express his or her sorrow. LAW: They sue each other for breach of a pre-dating agreement.
(From the "Rest" of RHF)