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Snow White and One Perfectly Good Person, Despite Being Short

lanz@fobvx9.fob.ford.com.eeo.fob.ford.com (Sylvia Lanz at GB-15/280 on 40-3939)
(original, chuckle, movies)

Original.

Did you hear about Disney's remake of its famous classic "Snow White and the
Seven Dwarves"?  They intend to keep as close to the original fairytale and
film as possible.

But of course, Dopey had to go.  They thought of renaming him to
"Intellectually Challenged" but the marketing department threw the idea out.  

Doc as the one dwarf with all the intelligence was definitely out!  They didn't
even try to salvage anything there.  

Bashful, speaking through a press agent, didn't allow his name and features to
be used as he didn't like the publicity.

Similar fates befell Sneezy, Sleepy and Grumpy.  Disney decided to go out on a
limb and keep Happy.  They still think it is politically correct to portray
someone who is in good humour.

The wicked stepmother?  You must be joking.  Definitely axed.  Ditto the
handsome prince.  I mean really!  Some white guy who has no qualifications to
his station other than being born the son of a king?  Forget it!  Certainly not
acceptable in this enlightened age!

The problem with Snow White was a bit more difficult to solve.  After all, the
heroine is rather difficult to cut.  And it does show a female who makes it
despite adversity.  But the original portrayal was so lame.  She was dumb
enough to swallow the line about the apple.  (And to swallow the apple, for
that matter.)  It was someone tripping over a stone that brought her back to
life, rather than some heroic act on her part.  

So they rewrote her part a little bit.  She's now a high powered lawyer who
takes the old hag from the Better Business Bureau to the Supreme Court, citing
unhygienic food preparation and selling apples without a license.  Landmark
case.

And then they realized that they only had one dwarf left and that he was living
with Snow White in some secluded house in the woods.....  So when it comes out
in time for the Christmas present market, it will unfortunately have to be
rated X.

But other than that, it is identical to the original!

(From the "Rest" of RHF)


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