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Jokers:

	Being a subscriber to Vogon News Service, from time to time issues 
will the humor section called Vogonballs ..  Thot u would appreciate this
section. 

CARY

<><><><><><><><>  T h e   V O G O N   N e w s   S e r v i c e  <><><><><><><><>

 Edition : 2397               Friday 30-Aug-1991            Circulation :  8325 

VNS VOGONBALLS:                                 [Dick Binder, VNS Humour Editor]
===============                                 [Nashua, NH, USA               ]

    "In my new job i'll organize material which isn't available at the
    moment."

				- Email from unidentified individual
				- from John Keogh (Nijmegen, Holland)

    "And welcome to the Central Park on this the first Monday of the
    week."

				- DJ at night club
				- from Anthony Gorman (Galway, Ireland)

    "Please call immediately if you don't receive this."

				- Note appended to a FAX message
				- from Larry Hersh (Nashua, NH, USA)

    "[Stratus Computer] stuck with fault-tolerant computers, designed
    to keep working even if no parts fail."

				- Boston Globe article
				- from Tom Flaherty (Franklin, MA, USA)

    "When Hugo hit South Carolina, Charlotte was devastated by tomatoes."

				- Remark on hurricanes' potential for tornadoes
				- from Deb Bourquard (Nashua, NH, USA)


    "If you are sitting in an exit row and can not read this card ...
    please tell a crew member."

				- Safety information card in America
				  West Airline seat pocket
				- from Bob Ericson (Marlboro, MA, USA)

    "Except as provided in FAR 91.213, all instruments and equipment
    installed on an aircraft MUST BE OPERATIVE IN ORDER FOR THE
    OPERATOR TO OPERATE IT".

				- FAA advisory circular
				- from Keith Boardman (Nashua, NH, USA)

    +------------------------------+
    | Inexpensive, Quality Daycare |
    |   Openings Day and Night     |
    +------------------------------+

				- Sign in front yard, York, Maine
				- from David McDonell (Littleton, MA, USA)

    "Tomorrow is going to look like a whole different day."

				- CNN Prime News weather person
				- from Dave Burden (Alpharetta, GA, USA)

    "The Red Sox have another victory in the win column."

				- Jim Boyd, WCVB-TV News, Boston
				- from Paul Tinkham (Chelmsford, MA, USA)

    "Three white matching Victorian fireplaces.   Can be sold as a 
    pair.   #1,500 o.n.o. each."

				- Articles for Sale, Irish Times, 22 Aug 1991
				- from Colin Becker (Clonmel, Ireland)

    "Hurricane Bob is upon us!  Don't go out and gawk at the damage,
    let us do that for you!"

				-Channel 13 News, Portland ME 8/19/91
				- from Jody Bobbitt (Marlboro, MA, USA)

    "The stock went flat because the FDA didn't approve a new breast
    implant..."

				- Nightly Business Report on PBS
				- from Norma Comer (Dallas, TX, USA)

         *** Send VOGONballs to VORTEX::CALIPH::BINDER, not to VNS ***

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

    Permission to copy material from this VNS is granted (per DIGITAL PP&P)
    provided that the message header for the issue and credit lines for the
    VNS correspondent and original source are retained in the copy.

<><><><><><><><>   VNS Edition : 2397      Friday 30-Aug-1991   <><><><><><><><>

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