Switch on emulation = David Letterman
10) It really feels at home swimming in sewage.
9) You can improve your arithmetic by counting the rats that float by.
8) Studies have shown that shark repellent is no substitute for high bacterial levels.
7) The shellfish truly come in interesting shapes and designs.
6) The Iranian revolutionary guards have planted mines only in the Persian Gulf.
5) The dolphins are so friendly that they wash up on the beach to make place for you and your kids in the ocean.
4) With these dangerous epidemics in the air, it MUST be safer in the water.
3) In case of emergencies, medical AIDS are never more than an arms-length away.
2) Mario Cuomo performs his daily ablutions in the ocean and the Democrats haven't as yet washed away.
1) Ed Koch swims at Cape Cod.
Switch off emulation = David Letterman