An elderly couple was vacationing in the American West. Sam had always wanted a pair of authentic cowboy boots. On the next to the last day of their vacation, he saw the perfect boots on sale, bought them, and proudly wore them home.
He sauntered into their hotel room and said to his wife, "Notice anything different, Helen?"
Helen looked him over, and said: "Nope."
Sam replied excitedly, "Come on, Helen, take a good look. Notice anything different about me?"
Helen looked again. "Nope."
Frustrated, Sam stormed off into the bathroom, undressed, and clomped back into the room, completely naked, except for his boots.
Again, he asked, a little louder this time, "Notice anything DIFFERENT?" Helen looked up and said: "Sam, what's different? It's hanging down today, it was hanging down yesterday, it'll be hanging down again tomorrow."
Furious, Sam yelled, "AND DO YOU KNOW WHY IT'S HANGING DOWN, HELEN? IT'S HANGING DOWN BECAUSE IT'S LOOKING AT MY NEW BOOTS!"
To which Helen replied: "Shoulda bought a hat, Sam; you shoulda bought a hat."